What our pets teach us

A blog post about a loyal dog who ran around post-earthquake Sendai to get help for his beloved animal friend moved me this morning. We can learn so much from our beloved animal companions if we slow down to listen. We can learn to be present to what is and not what was, nor what we cannot fix or change.  We can learn to be more of a human "being" vs. a human "doing".


Please take a few moments to find a quiet place to sit where you can reflect on the teachings your animal companion has left you so far in your journey together.


And an intention to mull over....

Intention: Today, I take time out of my day to be still and honor the teachings our animal companions leave us. I honor their capacity for unconditional love, while never judging or holding grudges, their ability to live in the present in joy, fearless and protective of the family, and the  many countless other qualities that endear them to us.  I hold my animal companion close to my heart, always and forever.

from blog post: http://iwuvwes.wuvtags.com/2011/03/what-the-dogs-of-japan-teach-us/ 

A Pet's 10 commandments

For all animal caregivers young and old....


1. My life is likely to last 10-15 years… Any separation from you is likely to be painful. 2. Give me time to understand what you want of me. 3. Place your trust in me. It is crucial for my well-being. 4. Don’t be angry with me for long and don’t lock me up as punishment. You have your work, your friends, your entertainment, but I have only you. 5. Talk to me. Even if I don’t understand your words, I do understand your voice when speaking to me. 6. Be aware that however you treat me, I will never forget it. 7. Before you hit me, before you strike me, remember that I could hurt you, and yet, I choose not to bite you. 8. Before you scold me for being lazy or uncooperative, ask yourself if something might be bothering me. Perhaps I’m not getting the right food, I have been in the sun too long, or my heart might be getting old or weak. 9. Please take care of me when I grow old – remember, you too, will grow old. 10. On the ultimate difficult journey, go with me, please Never say you can’t bear to watch. Don’t make me face this alone. Everything is easier for me if you are there, because I love you so. -Anonymous


Re-posted from:http://sphericalrectangles.tumblr.com/post/2915896936/im-not-weeping-nope

For the Pets in Japan

Today we are blogging for the pets in Japan. 


To assist World Vets in their extremely important work, Be the Change for Pets blogged, asking the online pet community to help raise funds and awareness for the World Vets efforts. So here we are, to blog, tweet, post and share on FB about the World Vets Animal Relief Efforts in Japan.  Tomorrow March 17th is Paws of Japan Day.  Please, won't you help spread the word?

Events that trigger grief-ways to cope

Grief is not linear. It can strike when you least expect it. It can occur months, or even years after the passing of a beloved pet, person or event. Major change in one's life like moving, loss of a job, divorce, loss of a relationship constitutes loss. Grief excludes no one, even grief counselors.

Today, I find myself going over some of the lessons I teach others for myself. Grief is a form of releasing attachment. The attachment to the memories of the person, pet or event.

Tools like journaling, mediating, writing can help . Today, I am taking time out to give grief a voice so I can move through it and not let it weigh me down. My grief is not a new wound. It is several years old.  I've worked my process around the grief for my mother. Even so, I find moments that suddenly open my container of sadness.

This morning, I searched my freezer for some chinese herbs to heal my cold. A brown paper package with the cold formula had a date written on it. It was written in my mother's handwriting, a few months before her death.

I find that writing helps me to gain clarity when my mind is feeling foggy, especially today, when I am fighting a cold at the same time.  As the words come tumbling out onto the paper, thoughts and feelings are released versus staying tight inside my throat. I write about the things that are disturbing my peace, emotions, worries that unfounded, inner dialogues about the next path to take.
Sometimes, I dialogue with my inner counselor, the wise one that resides in a place of calm and peace when while the external world swirls. When I close my eyes and sit quietly, she comes forward.

Here are some things you can do to move through moments of grief

-find a quiet place to sit with your feelings
-take some time out to be in the feeling if you can (if you are angry, allow yourself to be)
-cry, punch a pillow, scream out loud, to release any emotions you might be holding onto
-write about the memory that triggered the loss
-write about any fears that might come up (fear of abandonment)
-reach out and call a friend who supports you unconditionally
-tell your friend you need someone to listen without responding, without need to change or fix
-practice acceptance
-practice surrendering what we cannot change

Things not to do
-be hard on yourself
-beat yourself up for what you thought could have, should have been different
-withhold love from yourself and others

The bittersweet herbs reminded me of my mother today. It is also a reminder of how my mother's death helped me move deeper into my grief work. I am grateful for this reminder. Bittersweet.

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Setting pet loss and grief standards

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Setting pet loss and grief standards: "Today, there are over 750 pet funeral homes, pet crematories and pet cemeteries across the nation — and a lot of human funeral homes have or..."

Setting pet loss and grief standards

Today, there are over 750 pet funeral homes, pet crematories and pet cemeteries across the nation — and a lot of human funeral homes have or are now offering pet cremation and services as part of their business. As a pet loss expert, I was proud to be among these pioneers the past 2 days at the second annual Pet Loss Professional Alliance Conference in Las Vegas.  The group met to set and maintain standards for services related to pet deaths, such as funerals, memorials, cremations and burials. 


While business goals and marketing efforts were discussed, there were also panels for compassion fatigue and pet loss.  It is great to have a confirmation that I too was on the right path. I look forward in taking all that I've learned at the conference and putting it into practice when I return. A perfect opportunity in combining a previous career in the design world with my current grief coaching practice to create interactive tools for vet techs and rescue teams will be part of Luxepet's 2011 efforts.  


For now, more visioning and thinking as I get ready to come home. Next stop, Venice CA to give hugs to my furry family. 

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Introducing our 5 day pet memorial candle

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Introducing our 5 day pet memorial candle: "Sophie, the inspiration behind my products company Luxepets would be proud of us this week. March has been an exciting month for us, in bet..."

Introducing our 5 day pet memorial candle

Sophie, the inspiration behind my products company Luxepets would be proud of us this week. March has been an exciting month for us, in between recording our 28 days of grief and healing Pet Loss audiobook, to launching 3 new products. In partnership with Morris Animal Foundation, we are excited to introduce the 5 day pet memorial candle, a caring and thought gift for the grieving pet owner.  Made from all natural vegetable wax and a cotton wick, place this candle in a special location and light for 5 days in honor of a beloved animal companion. Part of proceed from every purchase goes towards helping animals enjoy longer, healthier lives by advancing health and welfare for companion animals, horses and wildlife worldwide. 


In a few hours, I will be boarding a plane and heading to Vegas for the Pet Loss Professionals Alliance Conference. We will bring the candle and our pet loss services to share with funeral directors, pet crematories and other pet loss related professionals. But for now, we would like to first share this special candle with you.


Have you lost a beloved pet?
Know a grieving friend who could use some extra love? 


10% of all sales this weekend will go to Morris Animal Foundation.


Blessings,
Claire

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Consider a senior animal companion when adopting

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Consider a senior animal companion when adopting: "Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog.' - Sydney Jeanne Seward Our animal companions can be wonderful teachers f..."

Consider a senior animal companion when adopting

Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog."
- Sydney Jeanne Seward

Our animal companions can be wonderful teachers for us if we open our hearts to listen. Their practice of unconditional loving, being present in the now and optimistic outlook are just a few of the things I try to incorporate into my daily life.  Imagine having years of practice at the items above, and then adding a few more to the list and voila, you have the makings of the perfect animal companion for your family.

I came across this wonderful site while researching senior pet products for a client. The Senior Dog Project  is a comprehensive website with a wealth of resources for adopting a senior dog including the top ten reasons why to adopt a senior dog.

It has been more than a decade since our rescue rat terrier Casey joined our family. Casey was in her early forties in human years when she came to be with us. Just like the list said, she was patient, an instant companion, knew what "no" meant, good at giving love for having been given a second chance. More than that, she instantly made her way into our hearts to stay. Now 119 in human years, Casey continues to be a great teacher, especially with my daughter Kayman.

Won't you consider adopting a senior pet today?

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Explaining death to a 3 year old

luxepets::pet loss and other thoughts: Explaining death to a 3 year old: "This morning, our 17 year old rat terrier did not want to eat her breakfast. A home cooked meal of brown rice, ground beef and broccoli good..."

Explaining death to a 3 year old

This morning, our 17 year old rat terrier did not want to eat her breakfast. A home cooked meal of brown rice, ground beef and broccoli goodness. Casey has been spending more and more time sleeping in her crate, her favorite spot in the house--the warm kitchen. Our daily walks have been getting shorter and shorter. In human years, she is 119.

My daughter, a spirited 3 year old toddler that she is, wanted to chase her "sister" down for a hug. Casey wanted none of it. How do you explain to a 3 year old her "sister" is at the tail end of her golden years? Kayman loves her "sisters". We've talked about death in general terms, as both of her grandmothers died before she was born. We've chatted about dead snails and slugs we've seen on sidewalks after a rainstorm. We've never had the opportunity to discuss it as it is happening, until now.

As I am putting finishing touches on a new workbook for parents to explain pet loss to their kids, I realize I will get to be my own focus/test group by using it with my daughter Kayman.

Below are some of the things I will be discussing with Kayman.
-Write down what are some of Casey's favorite things to do, foods to eat, funny expressions of love.
-Draw pictures of Casey with her family.
-Write down "feelings" Kayman has around death.
-Explain what happens when an animal dies. They stop breathing. Their fur/coat is cold. They look like they are asleep but they are not going to wake up this time.
-Plan a good bye part for Casey.

I feel the gifts and the blessings of being able to share this with Kayman. And the gifts of this upcoming book with all of you.