Grieving and breath work

In moments of darkness, try bringing the mind to breath will calm one's life. This morning, I practiced some simple breath work with a client experiencing anxiety and upset and it reminded me how our body temple is a truly amazing tool to re-balance our emotional states. Try this for a few minutes whenever you are stressed or find yourself having a "moment".


4x4 pranayama purifying breath to de-stress exercise.(A thank you to a dear friendCat Williford's post for reminding me of this exercise.) This helps bring your mind to your breath, back to focusing on you and not the things that's come unglued in your daily life.

Step 1: Sit with a straight spine or lie down.
Step 2: Inhale to a slow count of 4.
Step 3: Hold your breath for a slow count of four.
Step 4: Exhale to a slow count of 4.
Step 5: Rest with no breath for a count of 4.
Repeat twice more.

This one taken from Dying into Life, The yoga of Death Loss and Transformation.
Left nostril breathing is a calming breath. This is something you can do when you are feeling tense, upset or nervous. This will also help if you are having trouble sleeping.

Sit with a straight spine or lie down.
Take your right thumb and block your right nostril.
Inhale deeply through the left nostril for a slow count of 4.
Exhale equally slow for a count of 4.
Continue for 1-3 minutes.
For the last set,
Inhale deeply through the left nostril for a slow count of 4.
Hold your breath for a slow count of four.
Exhale equally slow for a count of 4.

What to do with ash remains and clay pawprints?

Casey's remains came back this week. A big shout out to Carol and Tracy over at Very Important Pet Mortuary . Her ashes arrived in a nice brocade urn, along with a pawprint and some of her fur clippings. The care, thoughtfulness they put into commemorating the life of a beloved fur family member is truly heartfelt. For anyone living in the Los Angeles area, I cannot speak highly of them. Here is a layout of the return of Casey Chew.

For most pet parents, this can be a very traumatic time in the grief journey. Something about seeing the ashes along with the lockets of hair together with the clay imprint brings finality to the loss. Even though I have held services, gone to viewings and cremations of clients past, I couldn't help but think to myself this morning, "wow, this is what is left of her little physical body, what would Casey like me to do with her?" In the past, I may have considered a burial at sea.

This Spring, I attended the PLPA 2nd annual conference and met up with an eco friendly urn manufacturer called Let Your Love Grow. For many years now, there is a misconception that natural cremation when mixed with the earth, return naturally to the ground. Did you know that the ashes are inert and do not naturally break down? The folks at Let Your Love Grow has created an amazing planting medium that when combined with the remains, will use the phosphorus and calcium in the remains to work magic with mother nature.
This is lovely and fitting for Ms. Casey, who loved to be in the great outdoors with her sister Lulu.

If you have lost a beloved animal family member, did you bury, cremate or? What stories do you have to share? Stay tuned next week for what happens with the clippings and clay imprint.

Euthanasia--When is the right time?

Monday Evening: I was wrapping up work for the evening. Casey walked over and stood facing me, as if wanting to talk. Engrossed with an email, I kept typing and she walked away, only to circle back several times. Those huge eyes staring at me. I heard a voice inside my head go, It's time.
But it can't be yet. The vet had said a few more months.

Tuesday evening: We were watching TV and Michael called out to Casey. Very social, she loved to come snuggle next to us. That night, she looked at us with solemn eyes from her spot across the sectional and remained seated.It was so unlike her. My heart sank just a bit deeper. And again, the voice said, it's time. Michael looked at me and both of us at the same time knew.

Wednesday morning: As I was giving Casey her saline injections, she turned around and gave me this look, like REALLY?

Friday: Calls to the Vet, calls to the animal communicator, calls to the pet mortuary. Details, hugs, and more details.

Kayman was not going to be home until Sunday night to say goodbye. Casey and I had a talk. Intuitive coach said it was going to be a close call. I prayed alot this weekend.

Sunday: To an outsider, she looked like a pup who had a good long life. 17 beloved years. With patches of gray fur, she still loved to play with her 2 legged and 4 legged sisters. She slept most of the day and her appetite was light, yet the bigness of her spirit was still bright. At her good bye party, many commented on how much energy she had in her. We shared stories about her bright light, love of life, her sweet disposition, quirkiness. People came and went. Casey was happy. And exhausted.

Monday: We were surprised to witness Casey's decline from the day before. Today, she did not want to come out of the kennel. Kayman gave her sister one last squeeze before heading to pre-school. Kayman understood it was time and that Casey was dying. The pet doctor was coming to give her a shot to help her transition.

Casey asked me to help spread the message to all pet lovers out there. To use her as an example of a pup who was loved and is ready to go. Please share this video with all pet lovers you know.

HOW DO YOU KNOW IT'S TIME?

TRUST---TRUST YOUR INTUITION---OPEN YOUR HEART---LEAN INTO THE PAIN----MAKE YOUR DECISIONS ON THEIR BEHALF----PUT YOUR OWN EMOTIONAL NEEDS SECOND IF YOU CAN.

With gratitude,
claire & casey

Remembering Casey Chew: 1994-2011 You will be missed.